Can someone learn to feel Indian cooking in less than a week? An essay about cooking, and family
Illustration: Ping Zhu To anyone else, the fish curry may have been a typical weeknight dinner, but my fiancée, Michelle, was anxious to know what I thought of it. “So,” she said as soon as I’d taken my first bite, “how does it taste?”
My parents weren’t snobs in the slightest, and they’d already eaten — and loved — Michelle’s cooking plenty of times. But, for both Michelle and me, the stakes felt higher this time around. My Indian-American father and my Puerto Rican–Italian-American mother were Indian-food aficionados, and they appreciated the difference between authentic cooking and “wedding food,” as we called it: less spicy, heavy on the cream, made to please all palates.
Michelle, an accomplished painter and installation artist, valued her own ability to generate something from scratch. From her perspective, a kitchen countertop was a blank canvas, and a plate was the frame for her creation. Always fiercely independent, she never liked to rely on others for assistance unless to support her own vision.
Meanwhile, Michelle was after perfection and, for a week, we ate her test runs, varying curries of lentils, eggs, fish, and chicken. She was understandably frustrated by the cuisine’s elusiveness. Using cups to accurately measure cumin, chili powder, turmeric, coriander, ginger, garlic, and masala didn’t mean achieving a consistent outcome.
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