After witnessing the deadly attack, I struggled with daily life and lost my passion for running. At the Frankfurt marathon, six months later, the emotional toll caught up with me
t was late 2013, six months after I had run the Boston marathon – the year two men detonated two bombs near the finish line,. Back in Germany, my home country, I had been struggling with my mental health for months, but I was determined to complete another marathon and maybe make it back to Boston. I had signed up for that month’s Frankfurt marathon, but told nobody except Christina, my therapist.
A mile or so before the finish line, I started running again, but I didn’t feel like celebrating when I crossed it. I went to get my medal, then stood alone outside, waiting, for about 10 minutes. I expected something bad to happen. When I realised I had nothing to fear, my world changed., which I did in 2010, then I wanted to tick off other major cities, so I signed up to run in Boston. I went with a friend, Inga, who was there to support me.
For the next few months, she worked with me. I had gone back to my job as a sales manager for a hotel group, which was good, because it meant I wasn’t thinking about Boston all the time, but it continued to affect my daily life. If someone was walking towards me wearing a backpack, I would cross the road; I would avoid rubbish bins on the street. I could no longer run; even after a short distance, it felt as if my muscles had given up.
The organisers of the Boston marathon arranged a worldwide video conference with therapists. I learned I wasn’t the only one finding it difficult to come to terms with what had happened. Hundreds of us were struggling.It was important to me that I could get back to running. Christina helped, coming out with me on her bike a couple of times a week, talking the whole time. The next step in my recovery was to run another marathon.