'We do not talk openly about miscarriage and fertility in America, and yet miscarriage is more common than the flu. One in six women will miscarry during their lifetime, and there isn’t a singular reason.'
The first time I felt the sharp twinge in my belly was during an important client meeting. Seated around the table were senior executives from a multinational information-technology company. We were developing the company’s long-term strategy when the twinge hit me again, this time followed by a familiar dampness in my underwear and then a slippery fluid sliding through me. I quickly handed the meeting off to one of my staff and ran to the bathroom.
We do not talk openly about miscarriage and fertility in America, and yet miscarriage is more common than the flu. One in six women will miscarry during their lifetime, and there isn’t a singular reason. Most often, the cause is a chromosomal abnormality—something goes haywire as the embryo divides—that has nothing to do with the health or age of the parents. For women who know they’re pregnant, nearly 20 percent of their pregnancies end in miscarriage.
While I was waiting in line to collect my winter coat after a professional event in New York, two men behind me were trying to decide on a new hire. The woman under consideration had an incredible track record at her previous job, had won a prestigious industry award, and fit in very well with the culture of the organization. But there was a big, insurmountable problem in their eyes: She was in her mid-30s and recently married, which obviously meant she was actively trying to get pregnant.
My fourth pregnancy stuck. At 24 weeks, my stomach was protruding, and I finally felt confident that I was in the clear. I didn’t stop working. I keynoted a conference for prominent news editors, and after, the nearly all-male audience asked me questions along the lines of “Who’s going to run the company from now on?” and “Will you step down as CEO?” One editor in chief of a large metro newspaper simply said, “Thank you for showing up in your condition.
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