Ask Amy: It makes me angry to be told to smile

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Ask Amy: It makes me angry to be told to smile
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I feel like making a sharp reply, but I stay quiet in the interest of peace.

What could you recommend I do in such situations?You are right about how disrespectful it is to call out someone publicly and to comment on their demeanor or facial expression — unless this is done out of concern for the person’s welfare.

I admit that when I violated her trust, I was in a dark place emotionally. I was depressed and unhappy. I didn’t like the route our relationship was taking. We lacked communication — on both our parts, but more from me.We barely made any time to spend together, and when we did it would be either with the kids or a group of friends. We almost never made time for us.She says that things won’t be the same. I understand why she believes that, but I know that we can find a way past this.

You perpetually “throw chaos” into your relationship, and then disappear when things get tough. You help to create the problem and then you run away from the problem. This is classic “fight or flight” behavior, and you can change it. “Bouncing back” is not in the cards for you. But you can rebuild your relationship and help to repair your family’s life, as long as you are willing to put in the work.

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