Dave Tarnowski's disappointing affirmations are making millions on Instagram laugh. But his point is serious: As a man who has lived with depression and anxiety his entire life, he wants to strip stigma from mental illness and make people feel seen.
When Dave Tarnowksi, an introverted 46-year-old author from Queens, New York, posted these words on Instagram , over a picture of a pink cloud-strewn sky, he had no idea they would catapult him to online fame. He had spent years posting memes online, in various guises, and writing unfinished novels, but it was these eight words that exploded in August 2022, going viral. Three months later, to his astonishment, he had an agent and a book deal.
With his work, he says: "I found out there are a lot more people out there like me than I ever imagined." The message of his book, called Disappointing Affirmations: Unfollow Your Dreams, is "It's OK not to be OK".When I asked him what he has learned from his own experience about how people get by, he answers with characteristic blunt candour: "I'm going to be completely honest — I wouldn't still be here if it weren't for the people who love me.
When I spoke to Tarnowski, a kind-faced, bearded man who laughs readily and listens intently, he was having a good day. Most days, though, are not: "I'm always blue. It's my baseline. Always has been. I don't know if I've been bipolar my entire life, but I've definitely been depressed from very early on. Childhood trauma and all that."
Another balm of sorts is therapy, which Tarnowski said both saved and changed his life: "What you discover can change you, your entire perception of yourself, in amazing ways."So, if he were able to talk to those people at risk of suicide, what would he want to say to them? He sighs, then says: "Find your why, your reason for being here." He cites the Nietzsche quote: "If you know the why, you can live anyhow.
But he has a "why" that keeps him going: "Namely sharing my feelings and staying alive to show that no matter how deep the pain, there's still stuff to live for."The irony of Tarnowski's work is that it is actually, ultimately, affirming, showing that negative feelings can be affirming, too.It's been more than a decade since Saxon Mullins accused a man of raping her behind his father's nightclub in Kings Cross.
Crochet is more than craft — these women know the innate stillness and healing power that knitting can bringDown Mexico's north coast, many surfers and locals spotted the Robinson brothers. Then they disappeared
Disappointing Affirmations Instagram Depression Bipolar Disorder Julia Baird Mental Illness Mental Health Disappointing Affirmations Book Chronicle Books Suicide
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