Dear Abby advises a woman dating a man who won’t take care of her, an office worker peeved at a colleague’s annoying habit, and someone worried about their older friend.
I have been with my boyfriend for 11 years. In all this time he has never once asked me if I’m OK whenever I have gotten hurt. I got used to it, you might say. Well, I recently lost the ability to walk, and ended up in a nursing home for rehabilitation. My boyfriend would come to visit, but would never ask about progress. Furthermore, when I would show him my progress he wouldn’t act happy.
Now I’m home, and he treats me like garbage. I don’t know why. When I brought it up, he said he doesn’t know why. Should I end this relationship so I can find someone who’s supportive and who will help me get back to 100%? Or should I stay and work on this relationship? I’m less and less happy every day. —Your boyfriend of 11 years is not a nurturer. That he doesn’t ask if you are hurt or injured shows he lacks empathy.
I have a co-worker I share an office with. We are cordial, but not friends. The problem is she chews gum most of the day with her mouth open, and occasionally pops it. The noises she makes are extremely disturbing and they disgust me. I have taken to wearing headphones and listening to music as often as possible to tune out her noises, but it feels a bit rude and isn’t practical for all day. I’m on the verge of snapping at her.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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