I’m starting to feel like his child rather than his wife.
It’s interesting the way different people can view the same situation. From my perspective, you married a man who adores you and wants to help when he sees you are frustrated with something. Because you sleep separately, he comes into the bedroom to kiss you goodnight because he loves his wife. That this triggers a negative reaction surprises me. Many women — including me — would be thrilled.
However, because his demonstrations of affection bother you, choose a time when you can have a calm discussion and explain to him how these gestures affect you. It also might be worth your while to schedule a session or two with a licensed psychotherapist to give you some insight about why you react so negatively toward your husband’s loving gestures that you would write me about it.I recently made the acquaintance of a woman who just moved into our neighborhood.
I don’t want to hurt her feelings, but I don’t have time for someone this needy. How do I tell her to back off?Convey that message directly — but kindly — by explaining that you are busy with a husband, volunteering for a nonprofit and managing real estate and don’t have time to maintain the kind of relationship she’s seeking. Tell her you will reach out to her when you have an opening in your schedule.
Then suggest she may meet more like-minded people and make more friends if she begins volunteering in the community, too.
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