Dear Care and Feeding: My Partner’s Ex Is Suddenly Blocking Me From Spending Time With Her Kids

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Dear Care and Feeding: My Partner’s Ex Is Suddenly Blocking Me From Spending Time With Her Kids
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“I'm getting worried that I won't be able to be a part of her life if I'm blocked from her kids.”

Do you have any advice on what the partner of your ex can do to help you to trust them with your kids?

My girlfriend, “Bea,” is an amazing mom to two of the coolest kids in the world, ages 11 and 13. She got divorced when she came out as a trans woman, so there isn’t a lot of bitter drama or anger between her and her ex or anything. We’ve been dating for a year, and I’ve just started getting to know her kids . These kids are smart, funny, and creative, and I have so much fun with them. I would love to be part of their lives.

Because of these comments, and because of her not wanting me around the kids, she and Bea have been arguing lately, when they’ve always gotten along before, and I feel guilty about stirring up trouble in this family that has always been really solid. I used to try to be friendly and warm to the ex, but I’ve kind of backed off respectfully after she made it clear she didn’t like me. Still, I don’t know what to do about her banning me from “family events” .

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