It can make you a way better communicator when it's time to talk face-to-face.
Do you feel like you have a good sense of what you like and want during sex? Is it hard for you to communicate during sex in general, or is your particular challenge around giving feedback to your boyfriend? I specialize in teaching women, and one of the most common challenges my clients have is around knowing how to give feedback to their partners since they don’t know themselves what they like.
Now, let’s talk about some communication strategies. First, I suggest starting to talk about sex with your boyfriend outside of the bedroom. A lot of people try to start learning how to communicate about sex while they're actually having it, but that's a pretty high-pressure situation. Instead, maybe you can try talking about sex in a general sense, like rehashing your favorite sexual memories together with your partner.
Since you made a joke about sexting him, you can even try opening up these conversations via text. That can feel a lot easier for many people, and can give you that little boost of courage to start talking in person too. The more you talk about sex outside of the bedroom, the easier it will feel to talk about it while you're being intimate.right after you’ve just had it can feel a little easier, too. You’re not in the middle of the action, so it feels less overwhelming.
You mentioned you’re a pretty talkative person in your daily life, so I wondered if we could try to take advantage of that skill. Could you try spending some time talking to your boyfriend before being intimate? Additionally, the same way our bodies need time to warm up before having sex, our minds and mouths do, too. Try lying in bed with your partner and just talking about your days. If you feel like you’re already bonding and communicating, that may make it feel easier to talk during sex.
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