People who are chronic apologizers might be so overpowered by empathy that they have trouble putting things into perspective. Here's why.
The tendency to blame yourself for everything, or "over-apologizing," can lead you to feel unnecessarily distressed.
By scaling back your automatic empathy and looking more objectively at situations, you avoid the tendency to apologize for everything.How many times do you find yourself saying “I’m sorry” for something that is not at all your fault? Perhaps you saw your partner leaving the house wearing shoes intended for indoor wear. An hour later, you receive a distressed call from your partner who’s just fallen down on the sidewalk, resulting in a twisted ankle.
Indeed, it might not even take something going wrong to stimulate your apology. Perhaps you’ve witnessed someone else receiving harsh treatment through a verbal lashing from someone else. It aches as you identify with the victim. In reality, the unfortunate situation has nothing to do with you directly, but you can’t stop yourself from imagining how that poorly treated individual is feeling.There is surprisingly little research on apologies made for events that people didn’t cause.
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