The happiest children are found in Scandinavia, where they are given more freedom - and grit and independence are encouraged. Anxious British mother-of-five Anna Tyzack decided to put 'free-range' child-rearing into practice
The happiest children are found in Scandinavia, where they are given more freedom - and grit and independence are encouraged. Anxious British mother-of-five Anna Tyzack decided to put 'free-range' child-rearing into practiceFor every parent, there comes a time when it feels right to let their child make their own way in life. I have definitely not reached this stage. My older boys are now 11 and nine and longing to walk to school together but I’m not ready to sign the permission form.
In Scandinavia, parenting is not about policing so much as building grit or as the Icelanders call it, sisu. This simply won’t happen if we insist on curling – their word for helicopter parenting, as in smoothing the way in front of your child with a broom like in the Scottish sport.
Russell calls it developing mastery. “It’s that singular sensation that makes you feel as though you can take on the world,” she says. As someone who drops off their forgotten items at school on an almost daily basis, letting them run free isn’t going to be easy but in the name of happy children and sisu, I’m going to give it a go.It seems a bit mean to start my risky parenting with my one-year-old but given how much Isadora loathes her highchair, going strap-free seems an easy first step.
He climbs higher and further away from me, as I tell myself that the ground is soft. “Be careful,” I say as he climbs even higher. “I am being careful, Mummy,” he replies. And then of course he slips. He manages to grab onto a branch but he’s grazed his knee and one of his shoes is now stuck between two branches.
I try to convince myself I’m being paranoid, but no, he’s definitely following him. Sod taking risks, I’m there in a flash, standing between my son and the stranger, who is smiling into the middle distance and repeating under his breath, “you don’t see this very often.” I wonder what he means – you don’t often see a lone child? – but I don’t stop to ask him.
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