Meandering in and out of deflating dating situations, Imi Timms realised one friend had become her barometer for a decent bloke
e were sitting on the sun-drenched stairs at university when I flopped news of an upcoming date into our conversation. I was chatting with an old friend and a friend we’d just made, and the comment was directed towards the new guy. We were getting along too well and I wanted him to know about my existing situationship.
My relationship wasn’t exclusive but I’ve always struggled with the concept of seeing two people casually at once. I didn’t like the idea of living my own version of The Bachelorette; with far fewer helicopters and untouched cheeseboards.I regretted my choice to shut down the flirting as soon as I’d made it. I was already looking at him, thinking: “I’ll end up with this bloke one day.” It didn’t make sense to my cynical self; I hardly knew him.
As the turbulence of 2020 ravaged everyone, the new guy became a steadfast friend. I meandered in and out of my situationship, on and off the apps. “Love is a lie,” I would half-jokingly declare as my friends and I traded war stories of deflated dating lives. All the while I was childishly excited to talk to the new guy whenever the opportunity arose.
A year after we’d met, I was driving home from act one of a drawn-out break-up, thinking about him. He’d become my barometer for a decent bloke. “Yeah, they’re great,” the old friend and I would say to each other about some new entry on the scene, “but they’re notOnce the curtains had finally closed on the breakup, I messaged him. I “just happened” to slip my revised relationship status into our conversation.We were soon on our first date, and in many ways, it felt like our last .
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