No kid sits alone by choice, says Kath Lockett as she recalls the loneliness – and pain – of adolescence. sundaylife
Felix and I have our lunchtime walking route and we often see high school students sitting on park benches, perched on walls or generally goofing around near the soccer fields.
I want to tell this girl that high school will just be a blip in her life, with bodies, minds and opportunities moving so rapidly that some of her classmates will return after summer holidays almost unrecognisable. Interference or cheery platitudes from adults just make things worse. Time flies frighteningly fast for us but drags along lethally slowly during the agonies of adolescence. Whether we want to reminisce or not, those years were genuinely painful for most of us, no matter how long ago.In 1980, my father was a teacher in a small country town. I was about to start high school with my friends, had oodles of confidence and knew that I belonged. It would just be another stepping stone for me.
A fortnight later, this confident kid with sun-bleached hair from swimming every spare moment in the neighbour’s pool was stared at by her class when she stood in front of them, introduced by the frazzled French teacher. Her blazer was too big, skirt too long and the desert boots and white socks underneath looked ridiculous. For the first time ever, she felt out of place.
Lunchtime involved a mandatory school dinner. Holding her ticket, she’d patiently line up for a plate of mealies, soggy chips and wrinkled peas because it was a relief from standing alone. She’d sidle up to a spare chair and mumble, “CanISitHerePleaseThanks”, then plonk herself down, trying to eat while hiding behind her fringe.
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