Ultimately, everyone in the family needs support following a pregnancyloss.
It was two weeks after we lost our pregnancy when my oldest daughter — then 7 years old — asked me a heart-shattering question:"Does the baby feel alone in heaven?" It was one of many difficult moments I tried to navigate with my children and husband as my own grief blanketed my every thought and movement in the wake of my pregnancy loss at 22 weeks. It was also one of the many stark reminders that the impact of pregnancy loss is felt by the entire family.
At times, I didn't feel I'd get through the pain, let alone successfully lead my family through it. Especially since I didn't know other families who had confronted a pregnancy loss — or at least any families who openly discussed it. Statistics tell us pregnancy loss is relatively common, but still treated as taboo. I felt I was supposed to just get over it and move on because just weeks after the loss, friends stopped asking if I was OK. Julie G.
Gur said it's common for the partner who didn't carry the baby to feel there is no room for their grief. But Kays cautions that suppressing feelings isn't actually beneficial for anyone."Pushing feelings aside to be strong can be detrimental," she said."Studies show those emotions can be intensified later." A person can even become physically ill as a result of suppressed grief.
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