“It wasn’t that she was looking for a boyfriend, a father, or a grandfather. She just couldn’t help thinking about him.” New fiction by Sheila Heti.
That night, after work, she met him again, but this time at a lamppost, and they walked toward the same restaurant, but then they went into the one next door. It was a Korean place. She loved the little side dishes. She always felt she was getting more than her money’s worth. He told her that he was not a rich man, so she offered to pay, to show him that she was not after his money.
She and the father left the park and went into a nearby café, where it wasn’t so windy, while Tom, Jr., went back to work. “So,” Thomas said, as they settled themselves in a corner booth with two coffees. “Have you decided, upon meeting my son, that you still prefer me? It was wise of you to get that out of the way.”
But it was different with Tom. She actually wasn’t racing to the end of their nights together, their lovemaking, their conversations. She was happy to be in the middle and wasn’t looking forward to things ending; she wasn’t looking around the corner to see what was coming next. This perhaps had to do with Thomas’s satisfaction with himself, his life, and, by extension, her.
The next morning, amid the mess of the party—the bottles, the cigarettes, the rumpled rug—she apologized to him. As with meeting his son, another hurdle of understanding had been passed. He had, in his calm way, let her see the truth about himself by situating himself among other people. Most people would not have had the confidence to do this, but Thomas did, and this was part of the reason she loved him; yes, she did, she loved him.
He thought about it for a moment. “I don’t think so,” he said, but he didn’t seem convinced. “You want to get rid of“Theoretically, if I wanted to, is there some sort of time limit? Like, if you’ve been friends with someone since college, do you have to keep being friends with them when you’re thirty-one?”“Never mind,” she said. She suddenly saw that she was not going to get rid of her friends, even if she wanted to; she just wouldn’t have had the courage.
The next day, back at work, Agnes, Marla, and Junie stood around the coffee maker with Angela. The day hadn’t started yet, it wouldn’t start for another ten minutes, and they were all having their morning chat. They were talking about their romantic lives. Agnes was planning her wedding. Junie had just broken up with someone, and Marla was single as usual. Angela decided to tell them that she was dating one of the bank’s customers, a Mr. Thomas Swisher.
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