'Makeup is like my armour'
For many women around the world, learning to do makeup—or rejecting makeup as a tool of the patriarchy—is a rite of passage. For trans women, however, the bedazzling, bedeviling world of cosmetics is even more fraught.
Makeup made me feel more sure of myself when I really wasn’t, because it allowed me to navigate the world as a woman. It helped me navigate the world more easily, especially in a place like Halifax that has very low trans visibility. Like, if I look good and feel good, then I’ll have the power to make it to work. If someone is looking at me, then I can say to myself, it’s because I look damn good and not because I’m a strange oddball creature, even though it’s probably a combination of both those things. It give me the confidence to smirk back at whoever’s looking.
The eyes are where I have the most fun. The face is such a small canvas, but I feel that there are so many illusions that you can do. My routine is a lot about creating artificial light and artificial shadow. The light elevates something, accentuates something and the shadows allow depth. I understand that there is a social pressure to wear makeup, but I enjoy it, so I just wear it regardless. I feel like people shame me for wearing makeup all the time, like I’m submitting to the power of the world. People shame trans women often for doing feminine things and also for not doing them. They shame us for doing stereotypical things because they feel we’re contributing to some kind of oppression, but I just do it because it’s what I feel good doing.
To trans girls and women who are coming out and exploring makeup, I would say, make sure you’re doing it on your own terms. Make sure it’s something that empowers you, that makes you feel pretty and the way you want to look. At the end of the day, do it for yourself” —Amelia, 34, Calgary
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