My husband doesn’t want sex – and it’s wrecking my self-confidence

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My husband doesn’t want sex – and it’s wrecking my self-confidence
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I thought we’d turned the corner after a series of blazing rows. But it’s been more than a month …

‘He regularly stays up late and I go to bed on my own.’ Last modified on Tue 17 May 2022 14.06 BST34 and I am 33, with no children. We have had problems with our sex life in the past, as I’ve wanted it more than my husband.it’s now been more than a month since we were intimate. He regularly stays up late and I often go to bed on my own as he loses track of time. I am becoming despondent in our marriage overall, especially with the duties I used to take pride in.

as though our sex life isn’t important enough to him. I don’t want sex to be a chore but unless I said something he would never raise the subject. What do I do? I can certainly understand your frustration and despair. It is very important that you learn exactly what has caused him to withdraw sexually. This must be elicited without blame, so if you are unable to make him feel safe enough to share his feelings and thoughts with you, ask a therapist to help.

Pamela Stephenson Connolly is a US-based psychotherapist who specialises in treating sexual disorders. If you would like advice from Pamela on sexual matters, send us a brief description of your concerns to

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