Patricia Grisafi: The case should provide a sobering look at domestic violence and how it affects both men and women. Instead, it's a circus of misogyny and delusion. - NBCNewsTHINK
triumphing over Amber Heard, as if the defamation trial were a “Pirates of the Caribbean” sequel.Elizabeth Frantz / Pool via AP
The memes are grotesque. They show us that celebrity culture blinds us and enables toxic behavior, from online bullying of anyone who questions Depp to. And those reactions indicate that women are still unfairly burdened with proving they were abused at the same time they also must prove they were “perfect” victims.
Of course, this is hardly the first time accusations of abuse have made for social media fodder. But while other cases involving high-profile celebrities have generated their share of memes and fan support, the Depp and Heard trial feels different because of how prevalent the Depp brigade is and how antiquated the rhetoric about domestic violence has been. It’s like #MeToo never happened.
We can never really know what happened in Depp and Heard’s relationship, but how the public is consuming this trial is showing us the darkest parts of ourselves — and how we still don’t understand the dynamics and nuances of domestic violence. Often, abusers will have histories of violence, but that’s not always the case. Abusers can be kind to others while they simultaneously torment their partners. They can be charismatic, smart, funny and attractive. They can be men, women or nonbinary.
And survivors can be reluctant to come forward with their abuse stories for different reasons. Men often don’t like to beor disempowered, while women are scared they will be disbelieved and then harassed. Perhaps one positive result of the public response to this case is that more men will be empowered to share their experiences with abuse.
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