Parents Don’t Deserve Accolades For Loving Their Trans Child

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Parents Don’t Deserve Accolades For Loving Their Trans Child
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Parental acceptance of LGBTQIA+ youth is not expected.

Basic parenting shouldn’t have to “capture the hearts of thousands.” Parenting is hard work no matter how our kids identify, but loving them shouldn’t be harder just because they are bisexual, gay, or transgender.

As a queer kid who just wanted to be accepted, as a transgender adult who is tired of doing emotional labor, as the parent of a transgender child who worries, and as a LGBTQIA+ advocate and educator who knows the horrifying stats that put queer kids at risk, I say this with experience and love and no fucks left to give: If you are a parent or guardian of a LGBTQIA+, questioning, or gender nonconforming child — get over yourself.

Do not tell your child you need time, proof, or education. If you need to “mourn” the loss of what you thought you had when your kid comes out, do it privately and away from your child. There are books, support groups both online and through national organizations like, parents who have been there before, and the amazing world of Google to help you through. It is not a child’s job to educate, hide, or be patient while a parent gets their shit together.

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