Paris Olympics opening ceremony quick hits — Lady Gaga, heavy metal beheadings, Celine Dion, and a queer polycule

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Paris Olympics opening ceremony quick hits — Lady Gaga, heavy metal beheadings, Celine Dion, and a queer polycule
OlympicsOpening CeremonyOlympic Games
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From Lady Gaga making her highly anticipated appearance to an incredibly emotional conclusion with Celine Dion — here's the biggest moments from the opening ceremony.

In the pouring rain, athletes from every competing country floated along on boats of varying shapes and sizes as multiple performances took place across bridges, buildings and riverside boulevards in central Paris , celebrating all the weird and wonderful parts of French history and culture.

And given how badass their own history is, it's perhaps no surprise that an artistic recreation of the beheading of Marie Antoinette was accompanied by the metal band Gojira, whose members stood on platforms on the walls of a Seine-adjacent building while playing electric guitars and drums.

Greece, the traditional first nation in every Opening Ceremony procession, wearing a cream jacket over a navy pant-shirt combo: yawn, 3/10. Athletes getting tangled in the clear plastic raincoats as the skies above Paris opened: hilarious, 10/10. Monaco wearing red and white stripes with red berets and pencil skirts: read the memo too closely, 2/10.

Sweden wearing bright yellow jackets that look bulk-purchased from Uniqlo: we've already had Minions, we don't need more yellow things, thank you. 1/10. That didn't stop a couple of different, smaller protests taking place though. Some folks watching unfurled banners and flags in the surrounding apartments, while a small number of athletes themselves used the spotlight of the ceremony to shine a light on particular issues.

Over the course of the three hours, we saw a parade of pink-costumed dancers, some of whom wore giant heads of rats or costumes made of croissants. The figure then spent the next two hours parkouring across France's iconic buildings, racing along rooftops and zip-lining over rivers, carrying the torch with them everywhere they went, building the drama and mystery of who would be the one to light the final flame.

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