Perspective | Carolyn Hax: Is it wrong to date someone when there’s ‘no chemistry’?

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Perspective | Carolyn Hax: Is it wrong to date someone when there’s ‘no chemistry’?
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Carolyn Hax: Is it wrong to date someone when there’s “no chemistry”?

But: there is no chemistry. The kiss at the end of the first date was like kissing my brother. The kiss at the end of the second date was marginally better. I’m looking forward to the third date because I like spending time with him so much — but I’m already dreading the kiss at the end.

He’s been clear that he is excited about me and seeing where this relationship goes. I feel like I’m misleading him at this point. I love spending time with him, but I’m not even sure I can stomach a third thud of a kiss. I’ve never had this problem, and I have no idea how to handle this. Any ideas?Sometimes the best chemistry is the kind you develop from 0, over time, just through really liking each other. It’s something you both need to agree to and it’s not a fun conversation, obviously.

Another guy, I was not physically attracted to him at all, but nice guy. We hung out for a few months just as friends. But he wanted more, so one night I kissed him. It was okay, good enough to start “dating,” and in a short time there was incredible physical chemistry.I say be honest with the guy, remain friends, but leave your mind open to something more.I have a decades-long friendship with a person who starts looking at her watch every time she asks about me.

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