'It's OK that I’m never going to always want go for a run, just like I’m never going to always feel well and in control and happy. Both take work—sometimes a lot of work—but it’s worth it.'
A couple years ago, my partner and I ordered a navy-blue mid-century-style sofa online after a way-too-long debate around what style and colour we wanted to replace our old IKEA model with. It was perfect and, for the first year at least, I was vigilant about keeping our panther-sized cat away from using its sleek, sculpted arms as a scratching post.
I wasn’t even sure I could do more than a few hundred metres at first. But, bored at the gym, I wanted to try a 10k race. So I joined a run club sponsored by Lululemon because I knew I needed a schedule, and other people, to keep me accountable. I was truly amazed by how quickly my stamina improved, and the ability to meet those goals week after week made me realize that this idea I’d had of myself as a not-very-athletic person was completely within my control to change.
Everything started off great. I even hung my training schedule proudly at my desk as if to say, “There: proof—I am a sports person!” But about a month in, I had to miss one of our Tuesday evening group training sessions, and the next week I got busy at work and skipped two of my solo runs. It wasn’t as easy to make gains as when I first started running , and training in the thick August humidity was making me feel queasy.
So while I was sitting there telling myself, “If you get up and go for a run, you’ll feel better,” it wasn’t exactly convincing. Instead, I ordered takeout and went to bed early. The rest of the week followed much the same pattern: I dragged myself to work every morning, came home in the evening and went almost immediately to sleep, no longer even considering a workout.
Dr. White agrees that sometimes smaller goals can actually be more motivating for someone experiencing depression: “Simply tell yourself ‘I’m getting up and putting on my shoes,’” he says. “If you say you have to go on a 10k run you’re not going to do it. But if all you have to do is put on your shoes, then that’s often enough to get the ball rolling. Just focus on the next step; don’t worry about climbing the mountain.
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