The way some healthcare professionals talk about our parents really grates on me – even if it does come from a good place
t turns out that I have strong views on the use of possessive determiners, which is odd because I’ve only just found out that’s what they are called. It’s not their use that bothers me, but their absence.
I mean, if it’s a friend making the inquiry about a parent, then fine. Grates a bit, but no bother. Otherwise, the only people entitled to drop the my/your/our in reference to my mum and dad are me and my brother. Tellingly, I don’t even feel it’s appropriate for me to drop the second “my” in that last sentence, as it’s not my brother or close friends I’m addressing here.
It’s in the context of health or social care that it really starts to niggle. If a doctor, nurse or carer of some kind refers to “Mum” or “Dad”, I appreciate it comes from a good place. I suppose the informality is there to imply a gentle shared concern. But for me it strikes the wrong note, the tone cloying yet impersonal. I’m certainly not suggesting parents be referred to as Mr or Mrs; their first names will do nicely, as would the insertion of “your” before “mum” or “dad”.
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