33-year CIA veteran Kari Amelung speaks to VF about The Diplomat’s central marriage and the tricky realities of being a “tandem couple” within the agency.
that many “tandem couples” in the agency put off divorces. Once they begin legal proceedings, she explains, agents will be forced to forfeit coveted overseas assignments to return to the States. “A lot of times, because they don’t want that to happen, or want their careers to be affected, they would just live in hatred [with each other].”
“The personnel stuff becomes some of your biggest issues because if the spouse has a problem, that’s a problem for the officer, the security of your operations, everything,” she explains. “If one gets promoted faster than the other, the more junior one can’t work for the other. If one person becomes a supervisor, you [might] have to restructure your office so that two people can both have jobs—but one of them undoubtedly is not going to have the optimal job.
There were other strange romantic obstacles as well. When Amelung was stationed overseas under an alias in a war zone during the engagement, she could have no contact with her fiancé for a period of three or four months. “I could have been doing anything, including being unfaithful,” says Amelung. “But we trust each other and have given each other space to do what we needed to do.”
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