The struggle of shopping for clothes with a changing trans body

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The struggle of shopping for clothes with a changing trans body
TransgenderNon-BinaryStyle
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Before I could see the changes of hormone replacement therapy, I could feel them in the way that clothes fit.

Surgery, hormones, names and pronouns are some of the more well-known changes that go along with being trans.

In high school, I wore a tuxedo for my graduation, a decision one teacher perplexingly called "very brave", even though tipsily wearing a pale hire dress to a formal dinner is much more dangerous. They say transition is like a second puberty, but I wasn't expecting it to be literal. I tried to avoid looking like a 37-year-old tween, but it was difficult when Dragonball Z T-shirts were the only thing that fit.I'd experimented with clothes before. During my PhD I'd tried to save money and reduce the stress of decision-making by wearing the same outfit for a year.

But I was quickly disappointed by the drabness of mainstream men's fashion and the difficulty in finding anything small enough to fit me. Convincing myself that grey was an interesting colour and I didn't look like a rushed Christo installation, I walked out with an armful of badly-fitting men's clothes only to sheepishly return them all a month later.Having large breasts is not always an issue I want to solve but being misgendered makes me sad and anxious.

Even if I had the money to buy a whole new wardrobe, that wouldn't stop people making assumptions about my body.After I went on testosterone and had top surgery, clothes became important as measuring tools — I could track the gradual changes in my body by the way familiar pieces felt tighter or looser.

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