'Soup, this sustenance that communicated health, love, and community in a way that I honestly believe saved my life.'
My third cookbook was a dream project, quite literally. It made manifest the dream I’d had as a budding food editor just out of culinary school, to travel and eat while writing a book. In Austin, Texas, I rode a bike to a restaurant every day for two weeks to meet with my coauthor and chef. As I took notes from his line cooks during prep hours and hid in the office during service, I knew I was part of something exciting.
As I sat on the butcher paper in her office, I filled out a variety of forms that attempted to gauge levels of anxiety and depression. My doctor looked at my middling results and asked follow-up questions; my answers made her chuckle. She said my headaches were just migraines caused by stress, and described the sensation of a migraine, miming bands of pain around her head.
Around this time, notes from my editor arrived in my inbox for the Spanish cookbook. After a few phone calls with my agent, we determined the best outcome was for me to hand over the rest of my advance to a ghostwriter. And so my dream project was whisked from my hands as if it had never been mine at all.
Every day the cooler we left on the front porch was stocked with a jumble of jars, all filled with soup that suited my new diet. Many jars came with notes, but just as many came without: The wishes for health and love were implied in the soup itself. I spent the next three months undergoing daily chemo and radiation treatments, and to the disbelief of the team constantly monitoring my body on a cellular level, I grew stronger, healthier even.
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