Research shows how much we fail our kids when it comes to relationships and sexuality education. One of the reasons for this is simple: people are embarrassed. | Louise Swinn
Sex education has evolved in the past few decades, as seen in the difference between, for example, Cory Silverberg’swhich came out last year and is just as much about boundaries, pleasure and power as it is about reproduction and puberty, and that quintessential 1970s heterosexual guide to conception,The biggest shift in emphasis is around communication, consent and diverse sexualities and genders.
Marson’s research shows how much we fail our kids when it comes to RSE. One of the reasons for this is simple: people are embarrassed. But the antiquated notion that if we talk to kids about sex then we risk encouraging early sexual behaviour prevails in many quarters too. Marson likens allowing a child to grow up with inadequate RSE to handing a kid the car keys without giving them driving lessons, or sending them to swim without first teaching them how.
Marson notes the complete lack of queer sexuality education, the issue of the erasure of female sexual pleasure, and gives examples of the prudishness that obstructs education, such as programs being stopped because they include the word clitoris, and the attacks on the Safe Schools program.
As they get older, we teach them to say no to drugs and sex, but we don’t give them the tools or the language to do so; in fact, we’ve been telling them that they mustn’t say no – they should just do as they’re told. We do not teach or model discussion, negotiation or conversation on issues around consent, sex and sexuality. Her years working in the field give her insights substantial weight, and the argument for better RSE is resounding.
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