Love triangles, from King Arthur to Beyoncé

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Love triangles, from King Arthur to Beyoncé
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Affairs of the heart are sometimes spiky

n love, three is a magic number. Depending on the circumstances, that adds up to lies and betrayal, or the possibility of a brave new romantic world. Noël Coward gave us perfect proof of both sums. The first, “Brief Encounter” , revolved around Laura, an English housewife, alienated, unsatisfied and deep in a crisis she can’t quite articulate.

We needn’t worry about Elaine. Lancelot , Guinevere , Arthur are the fixed vertices of this story. But Guinevere’s bad reputation should give us pause for thought. Much like Eve disrupting the bromance between God and Adam, the Queen of Albion is a very early example of a female figure who apparently makes alliances between men harder.

As a pet-owner, Rossetti was more addict than expert. The register of deaths at his home on Cheyne Walk was compendious. Jessie the owl had her head bitten off by a raven. The armadillos burrowed into the neighbours’ garden, where they were poisoned by prussic acid. Two parakeets, a salamander, a lizard, a dormouse, a tortoise, a rabbit and two pigeons escaped, expired or were killed by jittery servants. But when a wombat went, it was properly mourned. Sometimes in verse.

One of the key stories of Bloomsbury lore asserts that the modern world began on a spring evening in 1908, in a flat on Gordon Square. Lytton Strachey walked into the drawing room and pointed at a white mark on Vanessa Bell’s dress. “Semen?” he asked. “With that one word”, wrote Virginia Woolf, “all barriers of reticence and reserve went down…It was, I think, a great advance in civilisation.

Rick’s and Ilsa’s song, “As Time Goes By”, was an old Herman Hupfield number that featured in the stage play on which the script was based. The film’s composer, Max Steiner, wanted to replace it. But the piano scenes were already shot and Bergman had cut her hair short to play the lead in “For Whom the Bell Tolls”, so Steiner swallowed his pride and incorporated “As Time Goes By” into his score. One verse hit the floor, in which Hupfield expresses his “apprehension” about the “fourth dimension”.

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