'I feel like there’s an over-saturation of love songs and songs about relationships that are in a binary. I think instead we should be talking about hurt, and why people hurt each other.'
When Nyallah, a 21-year-old musician from Los Angeles who uses both she and they pronouns, set out to write a song about her breakup in 2017, she knew she did not want the song to focus on the former partner. Instead, she wanted to write something that explored patterns of pain and healing in all relationships.
“I feel like there’s an oversaturation of love songs and songs about relationships that are in a binary,” says the artist in an interview withNyallah’s single “Growing Pains,” a comforting neo-soul-reminiscent groove about love lost, was released in 2018 and its corresponding music video debuted this month. The visuals beautifully highlight the artist’s sadness over her breakup as well as the community she finds in her friends when looking to let go of the past.
“Even though I did write this song after a breakup, I still wanted the song to be about me,” Nyallah, who was influenced by Erykah Badu and Lalah Hathaway, says. “When I was writing, I sort of asked myself, ‘What would healed me say to me right now?’ And that’s where a lot of the lyrics come from.” “Growing Pains” is lyrically beautiful; throughout the song, Nyallah reminds their listeners that growth can be “deceiving” or “pain disguised as healing.” The video’s message is simple, disrupts linear themes of healing, and reminds listeners that growth can be tricky, not just after breakups, but in all aspects of being a young adult.
“I’ve had people DM me saying that they were going through growing pains but didn’t know that’s what it was called,” Nyallah says. “The lesson that I discovered while writing the song is that if you feel stuck, it’s just a period of transition and there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I’ve realized that growth and healing are not straight lines.
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